Saturday, June 5, 2010

Hidden 2

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 11; the eleventh edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Everybody told him that the Castle was dangerous and no one should go there.

But Peter always had a curiosity lingering in the corner of his mind to see for himself, the hidden wonders or secrets or perils or dangers of the castle.

He always thought about the possibilities, on what could be so dangerous that everybody tells him to stay away from there. But Peter was one of a kind, never to be scared of anything or any one. Despite everybody staying away from castle, he always tried to sneak in to the Castle, but there were always guards posted on the entry to stop any one from getting through the door.

The guards were on the duty 24x7 since last two months, when 25 dead people were found just outside the castle. The town went crazy with the news and anticipation and fear. No One knew what or who killed them, the sight was horrific ...

Bodies were everywhere and it was clear that they were killed and not the other way round. There was blood everywhere so it was also clear that they were killed there itself but every town person could swore that they didn't hear anything or anyone that night but how was that possible that 25 people were cut to death and no one means NO ONE made a sound. I mean even the people who were first on scene screamed so loud that people from near by came running to see what happened. On seeing the horrific scene most that fainted right there others were trying to take care of them.

Police was on the scene within an hour and within 4 hours the castle was like a Military Cantonment with troops everywhere.

Till now even after 2 months of the incident news paper carried the news about the incident on the first page.

Two weeks later...

Peter decided that enough was enough and he will go and find out what secret was hidden behind the thick walls of the runes of once grand castle.

Peter tried to persuade Mark and Zack, his best friends to accompany him on this great adventure of their life. Naturally they refused because rightly they were afraid to go anywhere near that castle plus there was the little problem of guards.

They deduced guards were every easy to dodge and they will be across boundary line within minutes to deceiving them.

And to prove every stereotype of horror stories they chose a date and day which is synonym with horror, Friday, the 13th, and they started from their homes after midnight.

As they had prepared they blew some fire crackers in the alley near the castle gate, and as the castle guards went to check the disturbance, Peter along with his friends  passed thought the doors of the castle. They were prepared as they went with flashlights, baseball bats and cameras to click the evidences.

Castle grounds were silent so silent that for one moment Peter's friends pleaded him to go back and never to comeback but peter again convinced them promising them the best adventure of their lives and besides where else would they get another golden opportunity to slip past the guards like this.

The ground was reeking with strange smell of blood, gore and everything mixed together was successfully created the eerie atmosphere. But Peter was peter the bravest of them all, he knew it would take more, much much more to scare him off.

Staying together they tip-toed towards the castle. There was no light anywhere in the castle so once they reached the castle gates they turned on their torches which immediately illuminated the gate with little specks on light, careful as not to alert guards with excessive lighting.

As soon as Peter put his foot on first step they listened to every sound to alert them but nothing. but on third step there was a faint clicking noise which they quickly attributed to the old and loose stone step and moved on but if only they could.

Because although they thought that the stone was loose it wasn't, the sound they heard was of a switch which was hidden under the stone and which in turn activated the hidden security mechanism, and although they were alert before they could react to the sound of 'Whooosh" coming their way they were cut though two places, neck and abdominal by huge hidden swords or blades and within two seconds and before they could make any sounds, in place on Peter and his friends were now three dead bodies, cut away brutally and they never made any sound.

They were the prime examples of the saying that we should leave the hidden secrets hidden,

Next day papers were again abuzz with the stories of the hidden monster of the castle.

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  1. Interesting narrative. From your book shelf, I can see you like children's fantasy too. Probably thats where you get your inspiration for your stories. I also love all kinds of fantasy and SF but felt Eragon was too clich├ęd and Artemis Fowl was too childish even by children's standard.

  2. still I love reading .. and Fantasy is easy Artemis Fowl may be too childish but i liked it. did not add everything to my bookshelf yet. I have around 120 Books .. of every kind from Fiction to Non-Fiction, Fantasy, History, Biography, Self help everything someday i will pick up my courage and add all my books to bookcase. and Yeah Eragon may be cliched but none the less love the narration, and it will not be justice to except a teenager to right without cliche`. Thanks for the comments.

  3. Interesting fiction. Yeah, Artemis Fowl is childing and Eragon cliched ... but where Eragon wins is the narrative - almost like ancient tales, plus the growth of characters in Eragon is so good. This tale is too much like Hardy Boys

  4. Correction just counted I have 220 books plus whatever I buy in future.

  5. an interesting fiction.. u seem to have so much hidden dude! :D

    Leo - Hidden

  6. Written in quite a simple and natural way..The ending could have been more gripping , becasue i felt the whole story kept hooked but at the end made a little disappointment ..:) All the best for BATOM :)


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